for whom are we living for??

just recovering from the hibernation mode....so please bare with me if my language is lethargic at places.

For whom are we really living for.....our daily schedules are so busy and monotonic i get a feeling people( or atleast me) are losing their focus on what they really want and what they are doing to get there....

life is just moving along like a rudderless ship not knowing what to do next. We can positively put forward this state as " being and living in the present" i wish i was so ignorant as ignorance is bliss.
people walk into ur lives ...demand ur time, ur attention etc etc . We go ahead doing all the stuff we need not do, but we do them just to make them happy or just to see a smile on their faces. the real pain is when they in the same casual manner just walk out of ur life. Then we sit down and ponder about all the deeds we have done. The same actions which made us proud once will now make no sense and make us look stupid. At the end of it all is it really worth it???

The solution for this is ......just do ur own stuff,go ahead with things caring a damn for what others might say,say what u feel is right....basically call a spade a spade. But the problem with this attitude is people might mistake you for being arrogant , high headed .....

But then again man is a social animal and is responsible for the so called 'society' around him.....so still not sure how far this attitude will take me.....

still pondering ....for whom are we really living for......

Do i love or hate myself?

This was the topic of discussion when i last went home. My mom and aunt both being english profs, these kinda discussions are pretty common. Well that much for the topic. I blah blahed whatever that came to my mind and thought there would end the matter. But later that one small question has triggered in me a series of thoughts, opinions about what we feel about ourselves. We take pride in most of whatever we do (if not everthing). As time passes ...the deeds that were a moment of pride appear to be too trivial to be thought about. I at times love myself soooo much that the mind loses its discretion between good and bad and do things that feel right to me. Once that self admiration subsides, i start contemplating my past actions. I go crazy some times...wonder if this kinda things happen only to me or its only natural. Lots and lots to express ...but as i am writing this my already unstable mind is racing towards one more of such kind of intriguing thoughts. So thats all i guess......hope next time i'll be able to control my mind more to write a longer post.